The Funny Moments

In the past two days I have experienced those moments where you can do nothing but laugh. You know the one's where you are walking in a store some where, or driving in your car and something so outrageously funny happens all you can do is laugh out loud!!!!

So I was invited to a friends Christmas party this weekend. This friend shall go unnamed but to be honest her and I are not that close and our friendship has always been based on the eternal battle, in her mind, that she is smarter and more superior than me (I say in a phony English mocking tone). Anyway, I pull up to this house and I had just come from my work so my cloths were nice but not too dressy. Now being the intelligent and brilliant young lady that I am, I did not bring a coat to wear on my short walk from my car to her house in the cold weather. But thanks to my paranoid, yet always correct mom, I kept one in the car. Any one that knows me, knows that I have a very ecentric sense of style. Now the jacket I happen to have kept in my car was a coat that is pink, like bubble gum pink, with white horses all over it and a rhinestone zipper. Now this coat would be perfect if it fit me, but it doesn't so I can't close it all the way. Now imagine me walking up to a Victorian house off of 6th and layfette down town, in my wonderful pink coat. So I get inside and I can see it on all of their faces that me and pink coat are being snubbed and the only thing I wan to do laugh. I think its hysterical!!! I got through the next 45min trying to keep up pretenses that I was a rich, snootty, and ecofriendly girl that should be at this party. The funny thing is I could have cared less really if i fit into their world. I just wanted to scream "Hey your not that trendy and your not as cool as you think you are and you all know that my coat is the most amazing thing you have seen this year!"But I didn't, so finally when the hands of my matching pink rhinestone watch said 8:30 i couldn't get out of there fast enough. And all I did the whole way to my car was to smirk. The minute I heard the door slam shut....out it came. This laugh that had been there since I arrived and it didn't stop until I hit I 25. I don't know why i thought it was so funny but I know I will never forget it!

My second encounter with a burst of laughter in public was at the nail salon. I went to get my over-the-top Christmas nails converted into something a little less abrasive for New Years (and according to my dad boring in comparison to the Christmas green and red glitter nails i previously had). Now usually when I go in to get my nails done it so quite I can hear a pin drop. But on this Sunday the holiday rush was there to get all "pur-ddied" up for Christmas. So I'm sitting there getting loopy on nail fumes, when out of no where this women in the back starts to laugh uncontrollably. Now she wasn't just giggling or doing a girl laugh, she was all out, belly laughing from the tips of her toes. Now I have to back up for a second because when she came in her Son was with her. I figured her came along in order to go to the store or his friends house. But I quickly realized when he got into the pedicure tub next to his her, he was there to get his feet done. (I thought that was very peculiar for a boy of thirteen) Anyway, as the nail lady started to pumice her feet she just let out this infectious laughter. If you have ever had your feet scrubbed you know how much it can tickle. Once she started then the whole shop seemed to be giggling right along with her!! It was fantastic, then once she was done we realized we had one more foot to go. I LOVED it...it was spontaneous and she wasn't embarrassed at all! I thought it was the perfect ending to my perfect weekend!!! :-)

I love those funny moments

Thinking Thoughts

Hello there folks! So lately, and really most of the time, I have decided that I truely live in my head. I seem to constantly be thinking about situations and over analizing them instead of enjoying life. One person told me that was part of my Astrological sign and that I can't fight who I am. On one hand she is completely correct...and I like that I always think about the consequences and see both sides. The thing that bothers me the most is I tend to look at a situation, see the right and wrong, and if its wrong...I have done it any way! Now I just don't get what goes through your mind when you make a decision like that! Is it that in that moment it doesn't seem like a big deal or you truely don't care about the consequences? And if you make a mistake...why do it again?

I ask these questions because I have asked myself and can't seem to find the right answers. I always come up blank and I think that because I don't want to admit the truth to myself. I know when I have done something wrong because when I am doing it or have done it, I really don't get that much enjoyment out of it. I am usually so uncomfortable and paranoid that I can't let myself enjoy it. But if thats the case why do it again? I think the answer to this might be beacuse its to hard to tell people no. I can't stand to see disappointment in others or the look they give you when they are disappointed in you. I know this is a lot of babble and I appologize but i find it so easy to vent on here!!

I have been so run down lately and so not myself that I have to decided to change. As I mentioned in my first bog...this blog is about my journey of finding me. I feel as though I have done a lot of things wrong in my life and I hope to try and fix...but I am constantly thinking about that all the time and sometimes that gets frustrating. Its hard because you never get clear answers...its like one of those scenes out of movie where there is a wise man that talks nothing but riddles. Just spit it out already!!! Ha Ha...any way, my biggest goal right now is to learn how to forgive myself and learn to respect and love me for me. So if you have any suggestions on how to actively go about that...I am all ears. i am hoping that this will help but any other ideas are appreciated.


I know it won't happen over night but hopefully one day I will actually be a ble to look in a mirror and look at me...and feel love!